Humpday Funnies..
Apr. 5th, 2006 07:17 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
captain_philFrom
A koala is sitting up a gum tree smoking a joint when
a little lizard walks past. He stops, looks up and
says "Hey Koala ! what are you doing?"
The koala says: "Smoking a joint, come up and have
some."
So the little lizard climbs up and sits next to the
koala and they have a few joints. After a while the
little lizard says his mouth is 'dry' and is going to
get a drink from the river. But the little lizard is
so stoned that he leans too far over and falls into
the river.
A crocodile sees this and swims over to the little
lizard and helps him to the side, then asks the little
lizard: "What's the matter with you?"
The little lizard explains to the crocodile that he
was sitting smoking a joint with the koala in the
tree, got too stoned and then fell into the river
while taking a drink.
The crocodile says he has to check this out and walks
into the rain forest, finds the tree where the koala
is sitting finishing a joint, and he looks up and says
"Hey you!"
So the koala looks down at him and says:
"Fuuuu**k dude.......how much water did you drink?!!"
*** EDITED FOR ANOTHER FUNNY ******
A diehard White Sox fan amuses himself by scaring
every Cubs fan he sees strutting down the street in
their obnoxious Cubs shirts. He swerves his van as if
to hit them, and then swerves back just missing them.
One day, while driving along, he saw a priest. He
thought he would do a good deed, so he pulled over and
asked the priest "Where are you going Father?"
"I'm going to give mass at St. Francis Church, about 2
miles down the road," replied the priest.
"Climb in Father! I'll give you a lift!" said the man.
The priest climbed into the rear passenger seat, and
they continued down the road. Suddenly, the driver saw
a Cubs fan walking down the road, and he instinctively
swerved as if to hit him. But, as usual, he swerved
back into the road just in time. Even though he was
certain that he had missed he guy, he still heard a
loud "THUD."
Not understanding where the noise came from, he
glanced back in his mirrors but still didn't see
anything. He then remembered the priest and he turned
to the priest and said "Sorry Father, I almost hit
that Cubs fan."
"That's okay," replied the priest, "I got him with the
door."
A koala is sitting up a gum tree smoking a joint when
a little lizard walks past. He stops, looks up and
says "Hey Koala ! what are you doing?"
The koala says: "Smoking a joint, come up and have
some."
So the little lizard climbs up and sits next to the
koala and they have a few joints. After a while the
little lizard says his mouth is 'dry' and is going to
get a drink from the river. But the little lizard is
so stoned that he leans too far over and falls into
the river.
A crocodile sees this and swims over to the little
lizard and helps him to the side, then asks the little
lizard: "What's the matter with you?"
The little lizard explains to the crocodile that he
was sitting smoking a joint with the koala in the
tree, got too stoned and then fell into the river
while taking a drink.
The crocodile says he has to check this out and walks
into the rain forest, finds the tree where the koala
is sitting finishing a joint, and he looks up and says
"Hey you!"
So the koala looks down at him and says:
"Fuuuu**k dude.......how much water did you drink?!!"
*** EDITED FOR ANOTHER FUNNY ******
A diehard White Sox fan amuses himself by scaring
every Cubs fan he sees strutting down the street in
their obnoxious Cubs shirts. He swerves his van as if
to hit them, and then swerves back just missing them.
One day, while driving along, he saw a priest. He
thought he would do a good deed, so he pulled over and
asked the priest "Where are you going Father?"
"I'm going to give mass at St. Francis Church, about 2
miles down the road," replied the priest.
"Climb in Father! I'll give you a lift!" said the man.
The priest climbed into the rear passenger seat, and
they continued down the road. Suddenly, the driver saw
a Cubs fan walking down the road, and he instinctively
swerved as if to hit him. But, as usual, he swerved
back into the road just in time. Even though he was
certain that he had missed he guy, he still heard a
loud "THUD."
Not understanding where the noise came from, he
glanced back in his mirrors but still didn't see
anything. He then remembered the priest and he turned
to the priest and said "Sorry Father, I almost hit
that Cubs fan."
"That's okay," replied the priest, "I got him with the
door."
